Seven

sevenFor seven years, I have kept my silence.

With disconcerting thoughts, I have injected my veins with apathy. I have infused my brain with reflections of a selfish new me. I have permeated my consciousness with the dismal concept of your non-existence. I busied myself with the customary schedule an apolitical being would rather adhere to.

For seven years, I gave you time to help yourself.

I gave you the chance to renew your ways. All those times, you had the option to forsake those phantoms that constantly hound you. You had the chance to renounce ill specters that wander all around you. You had the chance to restore your dignity, not just to the entire world, but much more, to yourself.

For seven years, I have kept my distance.

I gave you the space that I thought you deserved and felt you needed. I shied away from you. My awareness of those pundits circling like vultures, ready to run you dry, did not matter somehow. You never appreciated people like me anyway. So why bother? You obviously don’t care. Why should I?

Succumbing to economic needs that are of essential but insignificant matters to me, I gave up on you. With both hands in my empty pockets and a nodding head, I left you. Across the seas I have ran away. I have tried hard to keep away from you. I tried…and tried… and tried. And for my own sake, I desperately tried.

I am not disappointed in you. I am with myself. And I am with Filipinos like me, who despite all things, still managed to keep their distance, kept their silence.

Seven years.

(A letter to my country, November 1st 2007)

The Paradox of the Road to Nowhere
The Antisocial is Dead
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6 Comments

  1. naintindihan ko to. ako di man maingay sa politiko, sa mga maliliit na bagay tulad ng mga pagliligtas sa mga menor de edad sa casa, pagrereklamo sa mga hindi sumusunod sa batas trapiko, at ngayon? ang pagtulong sa isang mahirap na pamilya na ilabas ang kanilang anak sa isang pribadong ospital na naka-detain ito mahigit na isang linggo na dahil wala silang pambayad. sa totoo lang… nakakapagod, nakakadismaya pero alam mo kung sino ang kinukuhaan ko ng lakas ng loob? si kengkoy, sya ay bilib na bilib sa pinas!!!

  2. BURAOT (Author)

    yep. we have to do in our own little way to help. madami kawawa sa pinas.

  3. I would like to help you , yet all I can to do are my best wishes to you and the hot thank you for your persistence to endure and not loose self respect.

    Now I could add my own story (my head bones were broken and I walked on the edge of the death for a long, yet was returned by God to life again for …. for appear the burden to my nearest?
    Sorry for such thoughts…
    The dawn will come ultimately!
    We will be the winners.

    Peace an love, my friend.

    I want to welcome you to my blogs. You will find lots of my artworks in the archives there. Hope you will have a good time and your relax would be my joy too.

    Let God bless us all.
    .-= Tomas´s last blog ..Peace and Love =-.

  4. nice kuya.. galing mo talaga.. napabilib mo na naman ako 🙂 i never thought of it that way; never looked at it on that perspective.. i always wanted to be in your place… dahil lang sa mga personal (at selfish) na dahilan…
    .-= reyapot´s last blog ..Bar Code Scanner =-.

  5. BURAOT (Author)

    hi Thomas, I am in fact enjoying very much looking at your works of art. it soothes me every time. keep on doing what you love my friend.

  6. BURAOT (Author)

    reyapots, lahat naman tayo mahal ang bayan di ba? iba’t iabng paraan lang kung pano gawin yun.

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